


dare you (to fall in love)

by apeunde



Category: VIXX
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-06
Updated: 2016-12-06
Packaged: 2018-09-03 20:06:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8728402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apeunde/pseuds/apeunde
Summary: there’s a twinkle in hakyeon’s eyes jaehwan can’t place, but he thinks the game is innocent enough anyway.





	

_Jaehwan is sprawled out on the floor of Hakyeon’s living room, which earns him a scoff and a nudge of Hakyeon’s foot. He can’t help himself, really — the heated floor makes it very hard for him to get up and go home (not that he hasn’t already spent the entire day over at Hakyeon’s studying with the excuse of ‘it’s too cold in the library’). He groans a little and moves onto his back blinking up at the ceiling, before tilting his head back to glance upside down and out of the window. It’s snowing._

_“Wanna play truth or dare?”_

_The question hangs in the air for a second before Jaehwan registers it, scrambling up on his side lazily to gaze at Hakyeon; there’s some twinkle in his eyes Jaehwan can’t place, but he thinks the game is innocent enough anyway._

_“Sure.”_

 

“Truth,” Jaehwan almost slurs after they’ve spent two hours and a few beers on the game, still sitting on the heated floor; the only thing that’s changed are the empty cans laying around, and, he suspects, their intake of alcohol, too.

Hakyeon looks at him, trying to focus his eyes on Jaehwan’s — it’s easier said than done when he has such a low tolerance level, but that doesn’t keep him from flashing a lop sided grin. Jaehwan feels a shudder run down his spine, because there it is again, that twinkle, and somewhere in his mildly intoxicated state he thinks he’s screwed.

“Have you ever thought about fucking me?” Hakyeon manages to ask, voice surprisingly steady but for the chuckle swinging along with the words. Jaehwan can feel his cheeks grow pink, and he suspects that it’s not the least bit from the alcohol.

“What kind of question is that?” He inquires, mind now weirdly clear, and the low chuckle coming from Hakyeon’s lips doesn’t stop the flips of his stomach at all.

“Just answer it,” Hakyeon teases, eyes not leaving Jaehwan’s. He looks down at his fifth can in his hands, and it suddenly seems much more interesting to debate wether it’s half full or half empty. He feels Hakyeon staring, and it prickles on his skin; Jaehwan swallows thickly.

“Uhm,… maybe, I guess,” he mumbles, and he hopes it low enough that Hakyeon doesn’t pick it up; seeing the look in his eyes when Jaehwan looks back up, though, he didn’t have much luck. 

“Your turn,” Jaehwan spurts out quickly in an attempt to bring the attention onto something else, “Truth or dare?”

Hakyeon’s eyes shine in the light of the room, and Jaehwan thinks for a moment his irises are growing darker; then he blinks, and Hakyeon is fiddling his own can in between his fingers.

“Truth,” he says, lips stretching into one of those smiles again, and for some reason this time Jaehwan’s stomach drops at the sight. There’s silence for a moment as Jaehwan ponders over the question, but the embarrassment is still painted on his cheeks; he isn’t sure if this is a good idea, but the curiosity makes his mouth speak before he can really think.

“Have- have you…?” He can’t bring himself to say the words out loud, but he’s fairly sure Hakyeon isn’t so drunk not to get it. Jaehwan can’t look Hakyeon in the eyes as he waits, resting them somewhere on the arm of the couch. He can hear Hakyeon chuckle, the sound broken by a little hiccup at the end, and his mind is a little too foggy from the beer and the situation to be prepared.

“You’re too good looking for me not to,” Hakyeon says, and Jaehwan both feels flattered and somewhat mortified.

There’s silence after that, thick and heavy, and Jaehwan can feel the air sizzle. He can feel Hakyeon’s gaze on his, burning his skin, and there’s warmth spreading in his stomach, making his heart race and his mind spin. He doesn’t know what to say, because this is not how he’s expected their night to be — but then again he doesn’t even know what he’s been expecting in the first place; being friends with Hakyeon is always a challenge, he should know.

Hakyeon clears his throat a little, Jaehwan’s eyes meeting his as he looks up and the tension in the air is now almost tangible Hakyeon’s eyes are dark, shimmering with something Jaehwan feels ebbing off of him in waves, and he’s afraid to make the littlest move. Hakyeon’s shirt has ridden down his shoulder, exposing skin, and Jaehwan’s eyes trail over the sight, sending a shudder down his spine.

“Truth or dare?” Hakyeon says, voice low, and Jaehwan swallows, but it doesn’t stop his mind from wandering places.

“Dare.” Jaehwan says, and it’s merely above a whisper, but it’s loud enough for Hakyeon to pick it up. Jaehwan can feel something between them click.

“Fuck me.”

 

-

 

It becomes simple, after that, fucking with no strings attached, and Jaehwan can’t say he dislikes it. Hakyeon doesn’t mind when Jaehwan hugs his pillow in the mornings while refusing to get up after the first ringing of the alarm, and Jaehwan gives into Hakyeon dragging him to a different coffee shop every time — not that he hasn’t done that before, too.

Today they’re at the Starbucks three blocks away from college, and Hakyeon is chewing on the green straw dug into his drink; Jaehwan doesn’t understand the idea of drinking hot coffee with a straw, and when he asks, Hakyeon looks at him like he’s demented.

“So it doesn’t screw up my chap stick, duh,” he says and rolls his eyes; Jaehwan feels slightly offended, but he doesn’t let on.

“No wonder my dick always smells so fruity after you suck me off,” he answers with a grin, and Hakyeon shoots him a glare that he’s sure is meant to skin him alive.

“Be careful or you’re not going to get any sucking off at all for the next couple of weeks,” Hakyeon almost growls, and Jaehwan can’t help but think that maybe it’s just a tiny bit cute.

“Like you can keep your hands off.”

Hakyeon throws unopened straws at him, one of which get caught in his hair, and suddenly they’re laughing so hard Jaehwan spills half of his coffee over the table. He likes moments like these, when everything is simple, when Hakyeon’s smile is warm and bright (he likes them almost as much as he likes fucking Hakyeon — and he likes that a lot).

His clumsiness ends up winning that morning though, again, making him knock his mug over as he tries to fumble his notes out of his bag to let Hakyeon take a look, and Jaehwan ends up having to buy himself a new drink just before heading to class. He doesn’t really mind much, though, sipping on his moccacino as he makes his way over campus, thinking about the way Hakyeon’s fingers trailed over the small of his back that morning, and he almost runs into one of the flower pots surrounding the fountain, hitting his foot on the concrete encasement. 

 

-

 

It’s two month head deep into this entire thing that he notices the small things — the way Hakyeon likes to bury his nose into his blanket in the mornings when he’s supposed to wake up, how he always takes plain coffee with one spoon of sugar and a squirt of milk, how his hair falls into his eyes when he’s concentrated — and Jaehwan wonders what’s going on. He starts feeling funny sometimes when Hakyeon’s eyes meet his, his stomach suddenly feeling light and his hands turning jittery. It’s unsettling, this change, and Jaehwan tries to ignore it the best he can.

“Do you want to stay for dinner?” Hakyeon asks one night; they’ve actually been studying for once until past 8pm, and Jaehwan can hear his stomach giving out a low growl at Hakyeon’s words. He blushes bashfully, rubbing the culprit to get it to calm down, but Hakyeon sends him a smile and his stomach suddenly flips.

“I’ll be making budaejjigae,” Hakyeon offers, and Jaehwan accepts with a small nod, still somewhat thrown off by the uncharacteristic tingling in his stomach.

He watches Hakyeon cook from his spot on the couch, elbows on the armrest and his head resting on his hands. It’s not the first time Hakyeon has cooked for him, but for some reason his mind suddenly picks up just how cute he looks in his cream coloured apron with the white frills, and Jaehwan feels downright mortified. He tries to will it all away, fixing his gaze onto the floor, but it’s a lost cause — his eyes just can’t stay away from the way Hakyeon moves around the kitchen, humming under his breath as he stirs the brew. He passes it off as being hungry, not having eaten for at least six hours, too submerged in his studies, but somewhere inside he feels like it’s in vain, knowing full well what’s happening.

When the food is done and Jaehwan has eaten two bowls and a half and is pretty sure he is more than completely full, the feeling subsides a little, and Jaehwan sighs contently; maybe it was the hunger, after all.

“Do you want some dessert? I have pudding!” Hakyeon says excitedly, clearing the table and almost skipping to the fridge; and Jaehwan takes in the way Hakyeon’s eyes light up and his lips break out into the most adorable smile and he knows that this feeling is not anywhere near to be blamed on his gluttony. 

 

-

 

When they fuck, they don’t kiss. It’s not a rule that they sat down, it just happened, like everything between them just happened without them planning it. And it’s okay, it keeps things from getting too far, too deep.

But as Hakyeon moans his name, legs spread and hooked around his middle, Jaehwan buried deep inside of him, hands on both sides of Hakyeon’s head, there’s the sudden urge to bend down and kiss those shiny, pretty lips. It throws Jaehwan off for a moment, makes his hips stutter and Hakyeon moan deeper, and instead Jaehwan bends down, trailing open mouthed kisses along Hakyeon’s jaw and neck until he fucks himself back up onto Jaehwan. He thrusts harder, faster, the high pitched whines and noises flowing from Hakyeon’s lips urging him on, and it’s not long before they’re both spent, reaching their highs with stuttering hips and broken moans.

The want to press his lips softly to Hakyeon’s doesn’t vanish as Jaehwan collapses down next to him, though, and he can’t take his eyes off of Hakyeon’s slightly parted, panting mouth. When he finally does, they only move up to his eyes, and it doesn’t make it one ounce better that Hakyeon looks beautiful, lashes fanned out on his cheeks as he tries to catch his breath, the light of the bed lamp submerging his skin into a beautiful golden color.

Jaehwan tries to turn away, but his heart is beating almost faster than before and Hakyeon opens his eyes, feeling Jaehwan’s gaze on his skin.

“Something wrong?” he asks softly, head tilting to see him better, and Jaehwan has to swallow the thick lump in his throat because fuck, Hakyeon has never looked so pretty before. He doesn’t trust his words just yet, simply nodding before turning to lie on his back, eyes now fixed on the ceiling. His chest feels tight, and it almost hurts; Jaehwan really doesn’t like where this is going.

He can feel Hakyeon watch him for a while, sleepy, before he resolves to close his eyes. Jaehwan tries to go to sleep, too, listening to the even sound of Hakyeon’s breathing; but his mind doesn’t spiral down, instead continuously throwing his feelings at him like he doesn’t already know how deep into all of this he’s gotten himself. 

Jaehwan stays awake until way past midnight, when his thoughts turn darker and his hope that everything will end up alright fades just a little bit; he’s too tired to fall asleep, body much too tuned on listening to every move Hakyeon makes next to him.

He doesn’t know if he’s dreaming when suddenly there’s an arm winding snugly around his middle, pulling him closer to Hakyeon’s chest. He’s frozen for a moment, unable to wrap his tired mind around what’s happening until he feels Hakyeon’s even breath on the nape of his neck. Jaehwan relaxes, then, and lets it all sink in — it feels nice, so nice, feeling the warmth of Hakyeon’s body against his own in something else than messy touches; he breathes in, as deep as he can, and for once lets himself snuggle just a little closer into Hakyeon’s chest.

Jaehwan knows this won’t last long, but he also knows he’s gotten in far too deep already to come out completely unharmed, and he figures if he’s getting hurt, he might as well enjoy the fleeting moments he gets to forget.

 

-

 

(Jaehwan wakes up twenty minutes before their alarm goes off — something very rare, especially for him. He’s sleepy, but even with his eyes opened just a crack enough to see, he can’t help but trail his eyes over the way Hakyeon is lying next to him, eyelashes fanned out on his cheeks and lips slightly parted as he breathes, chest heaving evenly with every intake of breath. 

Jaehwan’s own catches in his throat as he takes him in, messy hair, small nose, tanned skin, fingers resting lightly on the pillow next to his head — he’s out of a dream, Jaehwan thinks, because there is no way Hakyeon can be real. Even when Jaehwan remembers the lingering touches and the way Hakyeon moans his name he’s still 97% sure it’s all part of some parallel universe; his still sleep fogged mind can’t wrap itself around the fact that he is allowed to even touch him.

When their alarm goes off, Jaehwan fakes sleep, not wanting to let Hakyeon know that he’s been awake for some time; he isn’t entirely sure if it worked, but Hakyeon shakes him awake softly, fingers warm on his skin, and Jaehwan thinks that it was worth it, if only for that small touch.)

 

-

 

“Something’s wrong,” Hakyeon says after three weeks over the lid of his coffee, eyeing Jaehwan with worry shining in his eyes. His voice is soft, not demanding, but Jaehwan can feel the question weighing on it heavily. 

“With what?” he asks nonchalantly, blowing on his own drink to cool it down; he takes a tentative sip, only to pull a grimace when the hot liquid burns his tongue. He can see Hakyeon roll his eyes ever so slightly, but doesn’t budge.

“With you, Jaehwan. You’ve— You’ve been—“ Hakyeon’s searching for words, and Jaehwan watches him, mildly interested. He’s not surprised that Hakyeon’s figured out something is up with him; it’s not like he’s even trying to hide it at this point. He just can’t bring himself to voice it out.

“You don’t sleep much.” Hakyeon gives up and finishes saying, eyes flickering over the dark shade lingering under Jaehwan’s eyes. “And you’ve become quiet — it’s weird.”

Jaehwan can’t help but scoff at that, giving Hakyeon a look of ‘really, now?’ before opting to attempt sipping on his coffee once again, this time with more success. He can still feel Hakyeon’s eyes on him, so he shrugs noncommittally, looking around the shop.

“It’s nothing, just stressed,” he mumbles, trying his best to sound sincere. He knows Hakyeon doesn’t buy it, and he can feel his gaze lingering on him for the rest of their shared time. 

Jaehwan knows he should just come out and tell him, tell his best friend he’s fallen in love with him. But it’s not that easy, especially not if you’ve already been promoted to a no-strings-attached fuck buddy (with a+ marks on the fucking part, Jaehwan has to say). Jaehwan sighs, for what could have been the sixth hundredth time that week.

(It doesn’t help that he keeps thinking about Hakyeon’s smile each time he dozes off in class, or catches himself admiring how the way Hakyeon’s ears and nose turn red in the cold winter breeze make him look the most adorable kind of cute — but these are things Jaehwan tries to keep at bay, because they only result in two things: making his heart throb so hard in his chest he thinks he’s going to faint, and making him even more miserable after it calms down.)

 

-

 

Jaehwan catches himself waiting up for Hakyeon in his apartment up until late (it’s been some time since he’s been given the door code, because he spends more of his time in Hakyeon’s living room than at school anyways); it’s thursday, the day Hakyeon is practicing with his dance club for their annual dance performance at the school’s festival. Jaehwan has long since given up concentrating on his paper, instead writing down different ways of love confessions onto his paper in messy handwriting.

“You’re so stupid, Jaehwan,” he mumbles to himself as he looks at the words sprawled out on the paper below; he’s starting to get fed up with himself, and that’s something pretty unusual for him.

“Stupid? Why?”

Jaehwan jolts up at the voice, quickly covering the sheet of paper under half a dozen of others. He wonders that he didn’t hear the front door open when he looks up to meet Hakyeon’s gaze, a small smile on his friend’s lips.

“Oh, uh, I just messed this paper up, I think,” Jaehwan quickly manages, pointing to the papers sprawled out in front of him. He adds a small chuckle at the end, and he can see Hakyeon’s eyes lower to the stack of papers.

“I’m sure it’s not that bad,” Hakyeon says, tone warm as he moves inside; his hair is still damp from the shower he took after practice, Jaehwan notices, and his skin is slightly flushed. Jaehwan forgets to breathe.

“Want some ddeokbokki? I brought some from the old lady down the street.”

Jaehwan nods, shortly forgetting that Hakyeon can’t see him as he’s stacking the rest of the groceries into the fridge. He gives a small noise of confirmation, eyes trailing down to settle on the way Hakyeon’s jeans cling to his ass just right. Jaehwan snaps out of his little reverie when he notices Hakyeon is looking at him, bemused, one of his eyebrows cocked up playfully.

“Like what you see?” Hakyeon asks, his tone low and breathy, and Jaehwan thinks that he really needs to clear his head.

“Uh, I’ll— I’ll go take a shower!” he says loudly; he feels like he’s walking on self sown eggshells around Hakyeon. Hakyeon simply looks after him as he makes his way to the bathroom, lips stretched into a little smirk, and Jaehwan almost slips on his towel as he closes the door.

The hot water does little to soothe his thoughts, but it relaxes his muscles and makes his skin soft; Jaehwan feels much better when he puts his clothes back on and rubs his hair somewhat dry. He’s almost humming when he opens the door and gets back out, looking around for Hakyeon — and he’s pretty sure his heart just sank 4385 miles to his feet.

“What— what are you—“ Jaehwan starts, scared, wide eyes fixed on the papers in Hakyeon’s hands in utter terror. He knows from the way Hakyeon doesn’t answer that the sheet he’s reading has his name and several different phrases of confessions on it; Jaehwan wants nothing more than to disappear.

It feels like an eternity when Hakyeon finally looks up, Jaehwan still frozen on the spot, unable to look away; his eyes are shining with something Jaehwan can’t pinpoint, and it makes his insides drop another two feet, if it’s even possible.

“Why—“ Hakyeon starts, eyes flickering between the paper and Jaehwan’s eyes, unsure, “I just wanted to see if you really messed up your paper and then I found—“

Jaehwan sighs; it’s meek and soft, and he can feel all his strength leaving his body. He slumps down onto the floor, defeated. Hakyeon watches him with wide eyes, confused, and Jaehwan doesn’t know how to feel. There’s silence in the air between them, and it feels heavy on Jaehwan’s tongue — he’s sure that he’s screwed up now, for good. He doesn’t talk, simply looks down at the floor with sad eyes; he can’t think of anything he could say to explain.

The minutes pass, and Jaehwan starts to squirm a little bit, here and there sneaking glances at Hakyeon who’s still looking at the paper with big eyes, like he can’t believe it. He lets his head hang again, embarrassed; but then Hakyeon’s voice breaks the silence around them, soft and warm.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

The question almost makes Jaehwan laugh, the sinking feeling in his chest intensifying. He looks up at Hakyeon with his eyebrows raised up, wondering himself — but there’s no sound able to pass his lips. Hakyeon hesitates before casting his brown eyes down, and it’s funny when Jaehwan sees the pink streak colouring his cheeks.

“I would’ve— I mean I— god Jaehwan, did you really think I am not—?” Hakyeon looks at him, eyes ablaze and eyebrows drawn together, and now Jaehwan feels completely lost. 

“Wha— wait, what?” Jaehwan asks stupidly, eyes blinking in confusion. What is that supposed to mean? Hakyeon can’t mean— He couldn’t be—

“I love you.”

Hakyeon’s tone is weak, soft and defenseless, and Jaehwan’s mind is slow on picking everything up. He looks at Hakyeon with wide eyes, lips parted in disbelief; he’s sure he’s dreaming, he must be.

“You—“ He starts, but his words get stuck in his throat. Hakyeon nods meekly, eyes scared as they look at Jaehwan; and Jaehwan doesn’t know, doesn’t understand, because — wasn’t he the one supposed to be scared in the first place?

“Huh,” he manages unintelligibly, feeling far too stunned to form anything more coherent.

They look at each other for a couple of moments in silence as they both proceed the information. Jaehwan’s head feels like it’s swimming, and his stomach is so full of butterflies that he isn’t sure how he’s even sitting still anymore. He meets Hakyeon’s eyes, warm and soft, and it’s like that’s all he needed. A smile breaks over his lips, wide and toothy and a little abashed; but the small smile Hakyeon sends back, shy and with his cheeks tinted pink makes his heart soar in his chest.

“We’re pretty stupid, aren’t we?” he says with a chuckle, and Hakyeon’s smile grows a tad wider as he nods.

“So, uh, do you think I can—“ Hakyeon licks his lips, the color on his cheeks growing stronger, “I can kiss you now?”

Jaehwan laughs, bright and easy, moving in closer, their knees touching; he thinks his cheeks are going to fall off from all the grinning, but he really can’t help himself.

“You always could,” he says before he leans in slowly, eyes not leaving Hakyeon’s until their noses are a quarter of an inch apart; then they fall close, and they both hold their breaths when their lips touch, soft and warm and perfect.

 

-

 

(Jaehwan soon comes to realise that kissing Hakyeon is his most favourite thing — when they’re sitting on the bench of the park and Hakyeon’s cheeks grow rosy with the biting of the cold wind, when Hakyeon is pressed up against the kitchen counter, trapped in between Jaehwan’s body and the cupboard as Jaehwan’s fingers dip over the skin under his shirt, when he drinks in Hakyeon’s moans of his name as he buries himself deeper and deeper at just the right angle — it’s always perfect, like their mouths are made to fit together, and Jaehwan kisses Hakyeon every chance he gets just to be sure he’ll never forget the warmth of Hakyeon’s lips.)

**Author's Note:**

> just some playful haken with some mild angst haha ;;;


End file.
